My husband I just recently had our first child. Before the delivery, my husband clearly told them that we did not want them waiting at the hospital, but we would call them as soon as we were ready for them to come and would update them as much as possible. The delivery was more complicated than anticipated which meant it was long and they didn’t really get updates. They ended up showing up to the waiting room and waiting with my parents despite our wishes. In my drugged up state, I just hugged them and said hi.
MIL told a long story about how she was a nervous wreck and they were waiting around the area of the hospital for updates. When they didn’t hear them they “just happened to run into my parents in the waiting room” and decided to wait with them. My husband and I just wanted to move on from this and have an okay relationship with them for the sake of our son.
That was 7 weeks ago. A few days ago they brought it up again in an effort to guilt my husband into talking to them more. For context, he’s still working as an essential employee and very stressed (not a healthcare professional but works in purchasing at a hospital and is in charge of buying PPE). I have a newborn all day so neither of us jump to answer our phone or send them pictures but we do when we can. FIL said they were upset that my parents were asked to be there and they weren’t. The relationships are NOT the same and should not be compared in my opinion. We were planning on calling them first after we had some time with the baby. I really was going to give them a mulligan and move on but I can’t if they keep bringing it up. We’ve had many other issues with them this has just been the most important. My MIL is the most selfish person I’ve ever met and no matter how clear I am about how she hurt me, she doesn’t hear me and has excuses for her behavior. I’m to the point of cutting her off but I don’t know if that’s crappy of me to deprive my son of a future relationship with his grandparents.